to dearest nengli ,


i apologize if the quote under my profile affects you .

just incase you get my meaning wrong ;
what i meant and typed was :

Best.Friends.Forever - no .
Friends - still yes .

( check again )

well , as for me , i'll say that you're the one who has changed . maybe , it's just normal as it could be like you've seen me changed , so you'd treat me more unnaturally and from there i've seen you changed , so i'll react that way too . i can't say that i'm not at fault , but what can i do ? do you know , that that feeling is worst , way way WORST than a breakup ( BGR ) ? take it as a way to prevent myself from getting hurt again then . what do you think i can really do ?

as for Quinnson , not that i'm like ANOTHER " zhong se qing you " , whom changed after being attached . who do you think went through everything with me last year . okay , maybe he's a " victim " himself . ( here , i know the misunderstanding from last year arose again . but i will not be bothered to explain it once more ) but as his girlfriend and together for going a year , you see . . i don't have friends now . those as in whom could listen to me spilling every of my sorrows and happiness to , or share little secrets with . WHO'D STAND BY ME ? NO ONE .

it's not only you , i miss those sisterhood days too ! doing nothing , just hanging around , do some shopping and laugh like nobody's business and make it another day . but for now , besides him , who else to place in my number #3 love ? use to ; maybe yes , sisters comes first . as for now , i can't bring myself to do it . the trust just isn't there anymore . .

i don't know . i just can't bring myself to believe in " bestfriendsforever " . think . what happened to porlocks ? now thinking of it , it's kind of . . like lame . . i still treat everyone as friends . but i can't and will not allow myself to have bestfriends again . maybe , to spare troubles like last year . i'm tired , really tired .


sorry . ='(

BRENDA